Sentences with phrase «again at this baby shower»

Not exact matches

Like eat, or shower, or do jazz hands because both of them are free and you can, or stare at a wall because you can't do anything else, or stare at your peaceful sleeping baby because when are they going to wake up again?

i got in the shower & let the water meet my tears & something within me said - «this is the process sokhna, open to the process, open to the process»... that was the light... my mantra became «this is the process», & i returned to the bedroom... maria took my hands, looked me in the eyes & said «this is the process, sokhna...» i knew i was on my way... i rocked, squatted & allowed... maria checked me again & i was softening enough for maria to open the cervix the rest of the way... soon enough maria had massaged the cervix completely open & she told me to push... when she said this i filled with brilliance - i wanted to push, i wanted to feel it, i wanted to see wayana... in just a few pushes wayana kamalah lioneye ra was born - i held her as she came out - i looked at this little one & she looked at me & i told her i was her mother... kayenn came over & i saw a baby in him... this natural birth birthed my heart... i suddenly knew what kayenn needed, what i needed & what wayana would need... the placenta came soon after & maria helped me to bed... i really just wanted to look at my 2 babies - to stand over them & beam light, gratitude & promises of infinite love & support... i wanted a natural birth, i had a natural birth & it continues to this day... i am writing my birth story on wayana's 15 month celebration...

around midnight i began to question my decision to have a home birth, & maria was getting tired... she called in a second midwife for support & my doula arrived from another birth... i was afraid of the power - i hadn't felt it like this in kayenn's birth... i was afraid that i would come apart - even though i had to - i know now that coming apart is a part of the process... someplace in the middle of this birth i realized that i did not know how to do this - i was acting against the birth process - literally & emotionally... i had a mental idea of what it should look, sound, smell, be like... after some hours maria checked me again, i had been at 9 cm for 4 hours... she said to me, «some babies can come through at 9 cm, but yours will not, sokhna... sokhna, you are going to have to fight to bring this baby out... go into the bathroom, get in the shower & work it out... «so i did... i went in the cold bathroom alone & remembered every cold detail of kayenn's birth... i wondered if i could get to the hospital on time to have an emergency c - section & i began to cry... & as i cried i had to go to the bathroom - i sat on the toilet & the rushes came down like nothing i can explain - but they didn't hurt - it was just POWER!