Then it becomes one of those
horrible jokes where you don't get the punchline
for a second, then you do, then you realise it was aimed at you, and now everyone's laughing at you, even your mother, and so you try to join in to deflect and defuse the laughter but they can sense your
weakness, your panic, and this drives them into new paroxysms of vicious joy, their voices a swelling, cackling polyphony, and you want the earth to open and swallow you, and then - yes!