It usually comes as a shock to most couples that one partner gets overwhelmed because they're scared of saying the wrong thing again and
hurting their partner further.
Not exact matches
I have begun reading sociologist Eva Illouz's 2012 book Why Love
Hurts and while I haven't gotten too
far into it, and thus will likely have a lot more to say about, Illouz says the modern world, with its deregulated of marriage markets and freedom to choose one's own
partner has, made the search for love an «agonizingly difficult experience» that leads to collective misery and disappointment, which is then internalized by people — especially women — as a personal failing.
Dating sites offer a
far bigger database than any speed dating event and, unlike blind dates, you'll receive some basic information about your potential
partner (although some background checking never
hurts).
Our
partner is
hurting themselves and like us, is trying to protect from
further pain.
Getting angry at our
partner or withdrawing from the relationship makes perfect sense because we need to protect our self from
further hurt.
Some indications that your spouse,
partner, husband or wife has gone too
far include: getting angry at you when you disagree; punching holes in walls; throwing objects (aimed at nothing or at you); destroying belongings; threatening to
hurt you or leave you for the purpose of intimidating you; physically preventing you from leaving home; putting pressure on you not to work when you want to; insulting or ridiculing you; becoming jealous of your friends, activities, or hobbies; making you account for your whereabouts at all times; using promises and lies to manipulate you or to get you to forgive their angry or threatening behavior; isolating you from friends or family; making you ask permission to go out or make a career move; and threatening to harm your possessions, pets, or children.