The other two
insecure attachment styles did provide the child with a coping strategy: • Avoidant attachment was characterized by the child's emotional disengagement - a defensive strategy to the mother's lack of response; «Why bother reaching out when nothing happens»!
Not exact matches
But the good news is that research supports the notion that those with
insecure relationship
styles can and
do find a close, secure relationship with God as they turn to him and discover he is not like other
attachment figures who have hurt them in life.
That is, we know that
attachment styles relate to jealousy but we don't know that
attachment styles cause people to experience more / less jealousy — perhaps some 3rd variable (like a cultural norm) causes both
insecure attachment and jealousy at the same time.
The therapeutic relationship, if
done well, can be a healing source for such
insecure styles of
attachment.
Thinking about the recent meta - analysis on breakups in dating couples, one of the interesting findings of that study was that someone's
attachment «
style» (whether someone is secure or
insecure) doesn't predict whether that person's relationship will last or end.
Contrary to predictions, the secure
attachment prime
did not appear to buffer paranoid thinking and had a negative impact for participants with high levels of
attachment anxiety, highlighting the potentially aversive effects of exposure to secure
attachment material in those with existing
insecure attachment styles.
Those with secure
attachment styles did not participate in the HNP / PDR at the same rate as those with
insecure attachment styles, as they
do not have the same levels of trauma from childhood that affect their lives today.
I
do want to understand
attachment style and how secure or
insecure you felt growing up how secure or
insecure you feel in your marriage or relationship now.
This is especially true when one or more partners have
attachment trauma from childhood (
insecure attachment styles) or when one partner wants to open the relationship and the other has ambivalence or
does not want to open to other partners and / or lovers.