Acceptance of at least some violence as the norm in intimate relationships; fear of what the abusers will do to them or their children, family members, homes, or pets; loyalty to the abusers; conviction that the abusers want to and are trying to stop the violence; determination to solve the problem without outside intervention;
economic dependence on the abusers» incomes; unsuccessful prior attempts to enlist help; distrust of helping agencies; shame; and certainty that those listening do not want to hear the story — it is a powerful
list.