Until both the law enforcement and African - American communities are willing to own
their mutual share of the blame that has created the problem, there won't be a shared responsibility that will lead to the solution.
These include: • Failed attempts to increase closeness or intimacy • One or both partner's difficulty expressing feelings • Betraying partner's experience
of sharing feelings and not getting any response or a negative response • Betraying partner's tendency to go outside the relationship through work, drug / alcohol use, friends, etc. • Common negative cycles that prevent closeness such as
blame / withdraw, criticize / shut down, or
mutual blame