around midnight i began to question my decision to have a home birth, & maria was getting tired... she called in a second midwife for support & my doula arrived from another birth... i was afraid
of the power - i hadn't felt it like this in kayenn's birth... i was afraid that i would come apart - even though i had to - i know now that coming apart is a part
of the process... someplace in the middle
of this birth i realized that i did not know how to do this - i was acting against the birth process - literally & emotionally... i had a
mental idea
of what it should look, sound, smell, be like... after some hours maria checked me again, i had been at 9 cm for 4 hours... she said to me, «some babies can come through at 9 cm, but yours will not, sokhna... sokhna, you are going to have to fight to bring this baby out... go into the bathroom, get in the shower & work it out... «so i did... i went in the cold bathroom alone & remembered every cold detail
of kayenn's birth... i wondered if i could get to the
hospital on time to have an emergency c - section & i began to cry... & as i cried i had to go to the bathroom - i sat on the toilet & the rushes came down like
nothing i can explain - but they didn't hurt - it was just POWER!
When Jean - Louis Trintignant goes to the
mental hospital to visit his father, it looks
nothing like a
mental hospital — it's more like a visual idea
of a
mental hospital.
In A wall is just a wall (and
nothing more at all), Kapwani Kiwanga explores intended psychological effects
of different built environments, such as prisons,
hospitals, and
mental health facilities.