For one thing, confronting
uncomfortable issues in a marriage, rather than just stuffing them, and then facing up to your own contribution to the problems, requires summoning up courage — always a bracing exercise in what Virginia Satir called the task of people - making.
If a
marriage is suffering from an untenable red - flag
issue, then the underlying mindset of conscious uncoupling — which basically means tending to your own grief and other
uncomfortable feelings so that you don't project them onto your partner
in the form of retaliatory anger and longterm resentment — is a gentle and responsible way to dissolve a
marriage.