For example, if I tell you a story about a green man with a thin stomach and no beard, who never laughs a jolly «ho ho ho» but instead constantly scowls, and instead of giving
children presents he tortures them and calls them
names — especially the good ones, and then said the
name of this green man was «Santa Claus,» you could say that I am
wrong, that whatever I am talking about it is most - certainly not Santa Claus.
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs (PG
for mild epithets) Animated adventure, inspired by the beloved
children's best seller of the same
name about a town where a mad scientist's (Bill Hader) atmospheric experiment gone horribly
wrong leads to food falling from the sky like rain.
Chris Brown released a video explaining he was torn between two lovers: Rihanna and recent ex Karrueche Tran (diddums)... Someone leaked a sex tape of Hulk Hogan shagging the wife of his best friend Bubba the Love Sponge, then Linda Hogan was arrested
for drunk driving... Mila Kunis was
named Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive
for 2012... Jennifer Aniston colluded with a paparazzi photographer so pics of her enormous engagement ring would be flashed all over the globe and piss Angelina Jolie off... Nicole Kidman suggested Tom Cruise was a boring shag, telling Harper's Bazaar that Keith Urban opened her «up to trying things, my sexuality, those sorts of things»... Tom Cruise went to Matt Damon «s birthday party and got his bottom paddled by a burlesque dancer just to prove her
wrong... Jack Osbourne got married in Hawaii... Prince Harry was
named Tatler «s Man Of The Year — because their new criteria is being a skilled strip billiards player... Julian Assange and Lady Gaga had dinner together at the Ecuadorian Embassy in London... RadarOnline reported that Danny De Vito and Rhea Perlman split after 30 years of marriage because of his womanising... Stevie Nicks threatened to strangle Nicki Minaj to death, then apologised... Tori Spelling revealed that she had placenta previa with her fourth
child, Finn, enduring nine massive bleeds during her pregnancy then having emergency surgery three weeks after the birth when her C - section scars burst open... Lindsay Lohan got in a knock - down brawl with her mother in a limo and the police were called... Lindsay's dad, Michael Lohan, sold a phone recording of his daughter hysterically telling him that her mother was off her head on cocaine and trying to kidnap her to a gossip website... Olivia Wilde revealed the night her vagina died and how she and her current boyfriend, Jason Sudeikis «have sex like Kenyan marathon runners»... Taylor Swift was accused of cheating on her teen toyboy, Conor Kennedy, with his cousin Patrick... Happy Days actress Erin Moran was kicked out of a trailer park... and Bobbi Kristina Brown — daughter of Whitney Houston — and Nick Gordon, her adopted brother, got engaged.